Yay for corduroy, and for not being cattle anymore.

Oh I am so pleased with the new fallness of the weather! I had been trying for weeks to singlehandedly usher it in by the wearing of weather-inappropriate corduroy and cardigans, but all that got me was sweaty. I walk to work, which is thirty minutes each way, and I love the walking but I hate that all summer I got so sweaty, especially early in the morning. It feels pretty nasty to arrive at work and know that, even though it is a ridulously early hour, you already look like you were working in the fields all day. (That is a slight exaggeration, but not by much. Perhaps the sweatiness is a factor in why I haven't had a date in a long time? Something to ponder...)

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My oldest friend in the world (since second grade) just moved back to the area after 2 years of living with an emotionally abusive boyfriend. She is doing really well; she's got a job and a nice apartment and seems to be happy. I think she had to hit such rock-bottom in order to break up with him and move out that she had already sort of gone through a lot of the breaking-up stages in her head. So now she's, like, way beyond what people typically are doing at this point - talking about the guy a lot and feeling really sad and bad and needing large portions of ice cream in order to make it through the lonely night. Anyway, she's doing great, and it's great, and of course I am THRILLED that the guy is history. I went to her new place last night. She had her younger sister and her friends there, and another high school friend of ours, and we played a fun interactive card game called Apples to Apples, which I very much recommend having around as a party game. It got pretty loud and raucous. Also we were drunk, which may have been a factor in the game's funness.

At one point we all started talking about birth control. As you do. And it got me thinking, and I think I will go off the pill. I mean, when I got on it about two years ago I was with someone, and when that ended I stayed on it in an effort to keep my skin halfway clear. But when I think about it, my skin is not all that clear right now, and hasn't been for a while. Maybe I have become resistant to Ortho Tri-Cyclen's charms?

Also it has forced me to buy new bras, because my boobs went up a whole cup size. Most of my friends say that I should feel grateful for this, since it doesn't always happen, but I don't feel grateful at all. I want to be able to walk down the street again in a cute t-shirt without being sexually harassed every four seconds.

Plus, I have never liked the idea that I am pumping these extra hormones through my body on a long-term basis. It feels unnatural and unsafe, like I am making myself a Super! Extra-Feminine! Woman! Or, like I am cattle, being fattened up for the slaughter. And then, finally, there is the whole "controlling birth" factor of the birth control, namely that there is no reason for it in my case right now. As far as I know, I am not the Virgin Mary, so there is no possibility of pregnancy.

Anyway, by Murphy's Law, as soon as I go off the pill I will meet the man of my dreams, right? That is my ulterior motive in all this.