The lord our Bill

Three people in my family have July birthdays, so we all went to my grandma's apartment today for a get-together dinner thing. My grandma and her live-in boyfriend have a gorgeous condo in a big highrise, with a balcony and plants and art and beautiful furniture. The live-in boyfriend thing kills me. Most of the other tenants in their building are elderly too, so the two of them have let everyone else believe that they're married, so they don't have to deal with people's disapproval. They're living in sin and covering it up. Awesome.

(One good thing about this arrangement, from a purely selfish perspective, is that if I ever live with someone without being married, my relatives can't object. How risque can it be if Grandma does it?)

So today, my mom and stepfather were there, as well as an aunt and uncle and 2 of their daughters. Nine people. We had drinks, we sat around the living room, we opened presents. After the present-opening, I counted three copies of the new Bill Clinton book lying around. This is hilarious. The ratio of Bill Clinton book to human being was 1 to 3, which is totally appropriate for us. Bill is a God to my family. Lord Bill. Sir Bill. The Honorable Bill.

Next, as is our usual, we bitched about the current political situation and declared Fahrenheit 9/11 our official Family Film. My aunt was in really fine form today. She was telling us about this guy she works with, who is against gay marriage because he feels its legalization will somehow "devalue" his marriage. My aunt's response was something like, "Well, if your marriage is that shaky to begin with, a little counseling might be in order."

I love my crazy lefty Jewish relatives.