Am the fifth Golden Girl

I feel all gross because I haven't gone to the gym in two or three weeks now. Going to Phoenix for that week sort of messed up my schedule and willpower, especially since I spent most of my nights there drowning my stress with minibar Pringles and wine. (Which is a really good dinner when you are coming off of a fifteen-hour workday, by the way.) But lately I feel like a lard pig, so I need to get back with the exercising thing.

Another reason I have been really lazy is that I've been having problems with my shoulder for an embarrassingly long time now; like, over a month. It feels like a dull ache when I lift my arm in a certain way or lean on it at a certain angle. At first I thought I was just exercising too much (ha! that'll be the day), so I took a break from the aerobics classes that involve weights. It didn't change, so then I thought maybe it was like muscle tightness, and I tried doing lots of stretches, but that didn't work either. Finally I resigned myself to the fact that my body is no longer a Youthful Self-Healing Body, and I called my uncle, who is an internist. I probably should have done that weeks ago, but I really did think it would just go away on its own.

Okay, my uncle is brilliant. He asked me all these detective-esque questions about the pain and about my lifestyle. Finally he deduced that I have hurt myself painting. Embarrassing, yes. But true. He is a genius. All this time I assumed I pulled something exercising, and never even realized that my gym routine has been the same for months, while my painting routine has changed since I started with that class in September. Like, I used to just paint abstract stuff, so the canvas would be on the floor and I would sit and lean over it, but since this class is realistic painting, we use easels, so my one arm is up in the air for like three hours at a time. Why did this not occur to me? Is astounding. Also is astounding that I have injured myself with a continuing ed art class. Honestly, that is sad. And wussy.

Anyway, Uncle Doctor said it sounds like supra-something-something-tendonitis, and he gave me a referral to an orthopedist(!) just down the street from my office, and I have my appointment this afternoon. I am so scared of going to the doctor. Not of regular checkups, but of specialists and injuries and surgeries. Mainly of surgeries. However I think that tendonitis just involves taking anti-inflammatories and physical therapy and learning how to do the activity you need to do in a different, non-injuring way. Hopefully.

That will be pretty wild if I have to paint with, like, a shoulder brace for the rest of my life. All the kids at school are going to point and laugh at me. They'll be like, "There goes granny. Watch out, granny! Don't fall and break a hip!" D'oh!

Here is a Hanukah something to amuse you...it plays that "Hey Ya" song, so watch your speaker volume if you're at work.